I have frequently referenced Dallas Willard’s picture of the kingdom of God as “the effective reach of His power.” At a conference, Willard illustrated the connection between a kingdom and the effective reach of power by asking a woman for her purse.
She refused his request, and Willard explained, “Her purse is a picture of her kingdom.” Much like that purse, our personal kingdoms often clash with God’s.
Jesus addressed two specific issues that arise between husbands and wives where this clash is evident. If the individuals involved were willing to yield control of their lives to Jesus, their relationships would be legendary.
In Matthew 5, Jesus addresses the active role of God’s kingdom in marriage by confronting two serious problems. However, rather than focusing solely on the problems, this article will highlight Jesus’ solutions when couples choose to live according to His kingdom principles.
Surrendering Lust to Jesus’ Authority
Jesus taught that the root of adultery is lust. He also emphasized that, contrary to modern comedy and social media, lust is no joking matter.
You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away; it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away; it is better for you to lose one of your members than for your whole body to go into hell. (Matthew 5:27-30).
You’ve heard the expression, “Serious as a heart attack.” Jesus describes the importance of addressing lust with exaggerated language intended to stir us to action.
Since a person can still lust with only one eye or one hand, Jesus clearly never intended for us to take such drastic, literal measures. However, He did expect His followers to make every effort to cooperate with God in this vital area of personal relationships.
What I’d like you to imagine is what married life would look like if both the husband and wife had surrendered to the effective reach of God’s power.
Unlike the woman who clung to her purse when Dallas Willard asked for it, Peter and Andrew responded immediately when they encountered Jesus’ power.
As he walked by the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother, casting a net into the sea for they were fishers.
And he said to them, ‘Follow me, and I will make you fishers of people.’ Immediately they left their nets and followed him (Matthew 4:18-20).
They quickly surrendered their fishing business and began a new life of following Jesus to fish for people.
What if a husband and wife yielded and said to Jesus, “I surrender my preoccupation with lust to You. I choose to follow You wherever You lead me.”?
Not only would the possibility of adultery grow vastly slimmer, but they would also discover God’s best for their lives.
In a highly sexualized world, how do we surrender lustful thoughts to the Lord? We take action against lustful triggers. Jesus’ dramatic words about the eye and the hand challenge us to take decisive action regarding what we see and do. Everyone’s situation will be different, but if we ask the Holy Spirit to guide us, He will show us the way.
We can also apply this general principle to all of life. Unlike the lady who retained control of her personal kingdom over her purse, we can learn to hand more and more of our world over to the will of the King who loves us and wants the best for us.
The Kingdom and Divorce
Another interpersonal issue Jesus addressed is divorce.
It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that anyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery (Matthew 5:31-32).
Divorce is one of the most painful experiences anyone can have. I am thankful for God’s forgiveness and the chances He gives for new beginnings. God’s grace reaches all sinners, including those walking through broken relationships.
That being said, let’s apply the principles of God’s kingdom to married couples. What if Jesus came to you just as He came to Peter and Andrew? But instead of asking you to change your career, what if He pointed out one or two destructive attitudes or actions in your life?
Would you be willing to allow those behaviors to be transformed by the effective reach of God’s power? Would you say “yes” to Jesus and be determined to follow Him wherever He leads?
You are probably like me and know couples who have made decisions like this. Their choices may not have been perfect, but they were willing enough to discover new, healthier ways of living with one another.
You may also know a couple currently in crisis. Pray that they will discover the rule of God in their lives, and encourage them to yield their little personal kingdoms to the perfect guidance of the King of kings.
YouTube Discussion
Rudy Ross, Bruce Kirby, and I discussed this passage on YouTube today.
Real Voices 