You may remember the time when David had Uriah the Hittite deliver a message to his general, Joab. The letter instructed his leader to arrange for the death of a loyal soldier who got in the way of David’s lust.
A lot has happened since that fateful time when Joab helped David with his plot against Uriah. One daughter was raped by her half-brother. One son killed his brother in revenge for the rape of his sister and was living in exile from Jerusalem.
Once again, Joab enters the scene.
Now Joab son of Zeruiah perceived that the king’s mind was on Absalom.
Joab sent to Tekoa and brought from there a wise woman. He said to her, “Pretend to be a mourner; put on mourning garments, and do not anoint yourself with oil, but behave like a woman who has been mourning many days for the dead.
Go to the king and speak to him as follows.” And Joab put the words into her mouth (2 Samuel 14:1-3).
Joab instructed the wise woman in how to pretend to be a mourner who might lose her entire family due to an avenger of blood. David answered with compassion, similar to the time when Nathan told a parable to him.
The king said, “If anyone says anything to you, bring him to me, and he shall never touch you again.”
Then she said, “Please, may the king keep the Lord your God in mind, so that the avenger of blood may kill no more and my son not be destroyed.”
He said, “As the Lord lives, not one hair of your son shall fall to the ground” (2 Samuel 14:10-11).
Also, like the earlier encounter with Nathan, David discovered that he was the subject of the parable.
Then the woman said, “Please let your servant speak a word to my lord the king.” He said, “Speak.”*
The woman said, “Why then have you planned such a thing against the people of God? For in giving this decision the king convicts himself, inasmuch as the king does not bring his banished one home again” (2 Samuel 14:12-13).
David sensed that Joab was behind the woman’s parable. When he asked her if Joab was behind the scheme to persuade him to have Absalom return to Jerusalem, she told him the truth. Joab prevailed and he brought Absalom home to Jerusalem.
Even though David allowed his son to return to the city, he refused to see him.
The king said, “Let him go to his own house; he is not to come into my presence.” So Absalom went to his own house and did not come into the king’s presence.
So Absalom lived two full years in Jerusalem without coming into the king’s presence (2 Samuel 14:24 and 28).
Absalom couldn’t stand living in Jerusalem, but not seeing his father, so he went to great lengths to get Joab to persuade David to see him. When the two finally met, they embraced.
Reflections
Forgiveness is one of the central themes of the New Testament. Paul captured the sentiment of Jesus’ message of forgiveness.
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you (*Ephesians 4:32).
Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive (Colossians 3:13).
The subject of forgiveness was one of Jesus’ most frequent messages. All of Matthew 18 should be considered, but here is one of the key passages.
Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, if my brother or sister sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?”
Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times” (Matthew 18:20-22).
Jesus exaggerated our role in forgiveness to make a point. He has forgiven all of us more than seventy-seven times. If we refuse to forgive people who have harmed or offended us, we demonstrate that we fail to appreciate what Jesus has done for us.
One of my seminary professors said this about forgiveness. He said, “I forgive, but I don’t forget. I don’t forget that we all are sinners in need of a forgiving Savior. I don’t forget that the person who has harmed me is in need of forgiveness, just as I am.”
If we are having trouble forgiving someone, as David and Absalom clearly did, let’s ask God to help us forgive the person who has hurt us. That is a good beginning.
YouTube Discussion
Rudy Ross, Bruce Kirby, and I discussed this passage on YouTube today.
Real Voices 