The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous states, “Resentment is the number one offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else.”
We should not be surprised to know that Jesus is concerned with overcoming resentment.
Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, if my brother or sister sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?”
Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times” (Matthew 18.21-22).
My friends in the AA world have taught me that resentment and unforgiveness are like drinking poison and expecting it to hurt the other person.
Forgiveness sets us free while it frees the offending party from our desire to even the score.
Earlier in the chapter we read: “If any of you cause one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for you if a great millstone were fastened around your neck and you were drowned in the depth of the sea” (Matthew 18.6).
When we hold tightly to resentment, we cause others to sin. Some will see our example of unforgiveness and think that is the appropriate response when hurt.
Our resentful actions toward someone who has hurt us may cause them to respond in kind.
Jesus’ wisdom that calls for unlimited forgiveness is best for all concerned.
(1) It sets us free from the seemingly powerful need for revenge of some kind.
(2) We witness to others the impact of God’s forgiveness in our lives.
(3) We set the offending person free, provided they are willing to receive our offer of forgiveness.
The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant
As in the previous passage, Jesus underscores his teaching with a parable (Matthew 18.23-25).
The parable tells the story of a king who called his subjects to account. One owed him the equivalent of the entire wealth of Jerusalem.
The servant begged the king, “Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.”
The king would need extraordinary patience because the servant would never be able to pay such a debt. Nevertheless, the king forgave his debt and the man went free.
The servant found a man who owed him a small debt and “seizing him by the throat he said, ‘Pay what you owe.’”
The fellow servant responded and said, “Have patience with me, and I will pay you.”
Instead of forgiving the debt, the servant had the man thrown into debtor’s prison until his family could raise the funds to get him free.
This is how Jesus ended the parable: “Then his lord summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me.
“‘Should you not have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?’
“And in anger his lord handed him over to be tortured until he would pay his entire debt.
“So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart” (Matthew 18.32-35).
Our sin debt with God is one that only Jesus could pay. No amount of time and good behavior could erase this debt.
The Psalmist highlights God’s loving forgiveness.
He does not deal with us according to our sins
nor repay us according to our iniquities.
For as the heavens are high above the earth,
so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;
As far as the east is from the west,
so far he removes our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion for his children,
so the Lord has compassion for those who fear him.
For he knows how we were made;
he remembers that we are dust. (Psalm 103.10-14)
As we seek to imitate our Lord, let’s underscore features of God’s forgiveness in this Psalm.
(1) Forgiveness does not seek to repay the offense with harm.
(2) As forgiven humans, we have received steadfast love (grace) and compassion.
(3) God knows how prone we are to fail in our love and devotion to him. He knows our self-centered nature. He lovingly forgives our debt of sin.
As humans who bear the image of God, we should have a measure of this kind of forgiveness and extend it to others.
YouTube Discussion
Rudy Ross and I discussed this passage on YouTube today. It is on the Bob Spradling channel.
Real Voices 