A would-be follower of Jesus wanted to be a disciple but to delay his commitment to care for his father. Jesus responded to this man and said, “Follow me, and let the dead bury their own dead” (Matthew 8.22).
On another occasion, Jesus said: “Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:26).
Both of these statements came from the most loving person to walk the face of the earth. Surely there was a greater purpose behind his seemingly harsh language. Matthew records another instance of puzzling words from Jesus.
The 12th chapter contains a series of accounts where arguments between Jesus and the religious establishment take place. During these debates between Jesus and these men, his family arrives on the scene.
While he was still speaking to the crowds, his mother and his brothers were standing outside, wanting to speak to him.
Someone told him, “Look, your mother and your brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.”
But to the one who had told him this, Jesus replied, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?”
And pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! 50 For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother” (Matthew 12.46-49).
We read this story in a book with a leather cover and the words of Jesus in red.
The people who heard Jesus say this didn’t have our advantage. More than likely, they wondered if this was any way to treat your family, especially your mother.
What’s the Point?
If we are wondering about what priority Jesus should receive in our lives, the above three illustrations should make it clear.
Jesus must be number one. Family relations and devotion to the family are not to be excluded, but Jesus must receive the highest priority.
According to Jesus, this is the requirement for discipleship: “If any wish to come after me, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9.23).
In the first century, a cross was a place of horrific torture and death. When Jesus talked about taking up our cross, he meant that we must be willing to go to great lengths to follow him.
Our devotion to Jesus goes far beyond making Him a higher priority than family members. It is greater than our individual selves. Even to the point of death, we must be willing to walk with Him.
What’s the Payoff?
Can you imagine the privilege that Mary received of carrying the Savior of the world in her womb, holding him in her arms, and knowing him intimately as only a mother could?
Jesus offers us an intimacy that goes beyond being one of his biological family members. As we know and do the will of God, following him with utmost devotion, we are part of his family.
This is not merely “the family of God and brotherhood of men” kind of talk. Jesus calls us to genuine intimacy that is as deep as any biological family member might have had with the Savior of the world.
We often sell ourselves short. We first refuse to deny ourselves and follow the Lord as He requires.
Second, by not following Him with wholehearted devotion, we miss out on the blessing of deep intimacy with him. The two go hand in hand. When we give Jesus our all, we receive from Him greater and greater nearness.
I often recommend to people that they give all they know of themselves to all they know of the Lord. That is a good way to approach what Jesus is teaching us in this passage.
YouTube Discussion
Rudy Ross and I discussed this passage on YouTube today. It is on the Bob Spradling channel.
Real Voices 